Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize