I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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