So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize