I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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