im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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