I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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