i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
