I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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