I heard we made out
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
