Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
