Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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