obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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