but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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