that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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