I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
