need another drink. this is the easiest way
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
