When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
