You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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