Where is the hickey?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize