he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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