I'm laying in your front yard are you home
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
