Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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