Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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