Your tits are I can't wait for
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
