And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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