We're like a lot better than the average bears
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
