wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
