Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize