Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
