I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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