Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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