so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
