I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Randomize