why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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