Me too!
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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