Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize