It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
