Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
That accounts for only three of the penises
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
