Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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