Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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