I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
