how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
