ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
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