You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
