Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
