I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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