I murdered the dance floor call the cops
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
