why didn't you poke me back
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
