somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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