Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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