You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize