I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I think I sprained my soul last night
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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